Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Attack of the Lady Bits!!!

This just seems like the most frustrating thing.  Why do women's sexual organs start to attack their host?  I have been having this pain on my right side for about two weeks and it has finally become unbearable.  I went to the see the nurse practitioner this morning.  My regular doctor is on maternity leave.  The nurse practitioner is named Paulette and was a total glamazon, I loved her, styling from head to toe.  You could take bad news from a girl like her, you'd be so distracted by her cute capris and boots to care.  I didn't get any bad news really, but I did have to go in for an ultrasound.

So I went back to the hospital for an ultrasound later this afternoon.  This all turned out sucky for me.  First thing, I had to have a full bladder.  My lady friends know how bad this, they push and glide the wand over your full bladder and it takes every ounce of strength not to pee everywhere.  Second thing, my bladder wasn't full enough, so the tech had to use the other wand, the internal wand yuk!  The technician was so upset and exasperated by this, frankly so was I.  How do you know how full your bladder is?  If you have too pee, then it should seem good enough, right?  It never is, it's never simple.  Third thing, the technician was rude.  She was kind of annoyed about my abdominal plasty scar.  Saying that the reason I was having this pain was because of scar tissue that could be forming around the scar.  Yeah, that could happen, but I know that is not what is happening!  I had my surgery months ago and have been healed for months.  This pain just started two weeks ago.  It was as if she was judging me because of getting plastic surgery.  I wanted to yell at her, "Look you aren't a doctor, you have no idea when I had my surgery, and you have no idea what I am feeling!  So keep your uneducated diagnosis to yourself."  I didn't of course because I am a wimp, but I did say, "I would prefer to hear what the doctor has to say, thanks."  People need to perform their work correctly and speak within the scope of their license.  An ultrasound technician license does not make you a junior radiologist!  It just doesn't!

So yeah that was my crap day.  I think my ovary is attacking me and I got attitude from the ultasound technician.  Uh!  I won't know what is up with me until tomorrow.  But I don't think it is anything serious.  Probably just a cyst, I have had them before.  I don't know why women have to deal with this stuff all the time.  Cramps, blood, moods, cysts, babies, water weight enough all ready!  Just be chill lady bits, please!